The Art Festival got cancelled this year, due to Destruction Metal being the only performance that entered, and I was the only one to enter any art. In doing so I would like to show you my art anyway.
Below is the poem written on the window, with an explanation of what it means, and the process I went through to make it.
“Rubbished Frame”
Framed inside a window
Hidden behind the glass
Watching you
…
Fall Apart
She stands so transparent
Giving herself away
To all before her
Slowly chips away
White Cloak of Paint (Hidden beneath the paint)
Pealed to regret
Under every coat
More is revealed yet
She smiles at you
Her frown shown through
A lie in reply
To every question
Dirt upon her eyes
Blur the window’s shine
Tears down the glass
Mistakes to be ashamed
Undeserving Forgiveness
Replenished her rubbished frame
Looking past the flaws
To the beauty outside the [window] panes [pain]
Meaning of Art
The window, that was once beautiful, represents the life of a girl, who had a close relationship with a man. (Father-daughter, brother-sister type friendship). As he watches her through her life he sees her beginning to slip away. But he can’t do anything but “watch from the window”.
The girl is completely giving her life away to all that the world has to offer her, maybe even to the extent of sex and drugs. However all she once had and all she tries to possess (through sins) just slowly leaves her with nothing. Her life is “falling apart”
She tries to hide her sins/pain from you by putting up walls (“White cloak of paint). But eventually everything is shown through, leaving her embarrassed for her mistakes. (Pealed away to regret). Her sins and pain become evident in her life, which is represented by the layers of paint on the window. All the layers trying to cover other things up but in the end “more is revealed”.
She pretends to be happy but you can see deep down inside, the hurt. As you try to help her, she lies to you to block you off, denying the problem in her life, she hides herself.
The sin she is in has begun to blur her vision and views in life, distorting her look on things.
She finally breaks down in tears, to be ashamed of her sins. Christ then forgives her despite what she deserves. In his forgiveness her begins to “replenish her” messed up life.
Now that she has come to Christ I need to look past her flaws, knowing that she is changed in Christ. “The beauty outside the panes” is in a literal sense, looking at the beauty outside the window panes, the trees the sun and nice weather. In the poem it is referring to looking past the rubbished window frame (her life and mistakes) looking past the pain (panes-play on words) that she caused to the redemption that Christ caused inside her heart.
Making the Art
I probably put more work/thought into writing the poem and making the art then any other thing i have done. I was in search of making an art piece when I came a crossed this window in a junk yard. My initial plan was to put photo graphs in the window in a poetic way to represent a picture or a story in the whole. Later I decided I wanted to write poetry on the window. I began my work by trying to write a very short simple poem with a lot of meaning. The plan was to have one word written on each window. The window was going to represent my life. I wanted it to basically mean, despite my flaws can you still love me, can you look past the mistakes I make, because I am not perfect, and see who I really am, and see how Christ has forgiven me. So I started my work with the 6 word poetry.
Attempts:
Can you see past the mistakes
Will you look through my pain
Can you see beyond my mistakes
Can you see past my inadequacy
I ended with being determined to use this line: “Can you see past my flaws”. Even though I had the lines picked out I wanted to write a poem to go with it, and possibly decide to write the poem instead of the 6 word poem.
First attempt at the Poem:
“Can You See Past My Flaws”
Dirt upon my eyes
Blur my window’s shine
Mistakes I am ashamed
Forever to remain
White Cloak of paint
Pealed away to regret
Under every coat
More is revealed yet
Look through the [window] panes
Do you see anything fret
My function unfunctional
The purpose isn’t met
Torn out of the wall
Resting with the waste
Someone to replace
What was my call
Within my rubbished frame
Looking past my blame
Can you see past my flaws
To the beauty outside these walls
Then one day after taking a long break from the art project, I started reading through old unfinished poems, and some of the lines inspired me, and helped me to get new ideas for my art. Part of one of the stanzas in the finished poem actually came from a different poem I was working on and never finished.
The plan was to write on the window with a white sharpie. However those are hard to come by and when you do it cost you $5. I ended up decided to go with the painted look, which I decided I liked more. But I wanted white paint, when receiving paint from my friend all she had to offer me was black and red paint.
The longer the window sat in my room the more paint chips that fell off or people would pick off on me, ruining the project a little bit. As I sat outside painting my window, on the third windowpane (3rd stanza) I was resting my arm on the middle framing, while my elbow rested on the last window below. All of a sudden my elbow went right through the window, breaking the glass. The plan was to write 6, 4 line stanzas, 1 stanza on each windowpane. Except when I broke the last window I had to make a choice. Do I keep it structured with each 4 line stanza on it’s separate window, however stanza 6 has a broken window, so I either have to write it around the missing glass, or write it will words supposedly missing. I decided if I wrote it with words or letters missing where the glass was it would take away from the poem. My other option was to try to cram the lines from the other stanza onto parts of the other windows that it wasn’t meant to be written on, and that's what I did. At first the broken window was a disappointment to me, but in the end it really worked and brought more meaning into the window with the poem.
